Open Letter to Gym Grunters

Dear Mr.Musclehead Gym-Grunter,

Please (for your own health as well as the health of your future self who may desire children some day) refrain from carrying weights that are so heavy they cause you to grunt loudly enough for the whole gym to hear you. Seriously. It sounds like you are trying to pass a kidney stone the size of a melon, and honestly, I am worried about you.

Needless to say, I am also annoyed by you, since although you may think your grunts are a sign of superiority and physical prowess, to me, they signal danger and make my nervous system fire off into fight-or-flight mode. Every time you grunt (with the sound of someone giving birth to a small hippo), I get the urge to jump off my cardio machine and either run in the opposite direction or attack you in order to protect the rest of the gym tribe.

I’m watching you, grunter-man. Be forewarned: If you see a crazy-eyed, disheveled brunette running towards you in a pre-dawn haze as you bust your gut with those dumbells, know that my fight instinct has won. Run, grunter-man, run.

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3 Responses to Open Letter to Gym Grunters

  1. bluecurl3 says:

    hahahahahaha………..” crazy-eyed, disheveled brunette running towards you”. Now that is something i would pay to see.

  2. ArabObserver says:

    welcome back! funny post! :)

  3. kinziblogs says:

    Heh-heh. Grunters want attention, tell them to breath better.

    GREAT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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