Four.

You are four today, and I am celebrating with memories. Lately, I’ve been swimming in a sea of them, remembering the last few days before you were born, and many of the days that came after. The simple truth remains the same: I am more in love with you today than I ever thought I could or would be.

Memories of our special rituals – like Friday morning bagels before preschool/work, Saturday walks to the ice cream store near our house, after-work trips to the park where all the dogs used to come to play and knock you down, giggling so hard your curls looked as if they were going to fall off your head, dropping in on the hardware store after a trip to the supermarket so we can see the Choo-Choo that runs overhead, trips to the beach where all you really wanted to do was wait for the train to pass by, your suggestions to go to “da coffee place” on our way to school so I can get coffee and you can get a muffin,  weekend lunches at Jimbo’s, after-school/work visits to the water fountain where you would get hit by the squirters and laugh as I watched your bottom get soaked with water, and so many more will forever be mine and mine only. I carry them with me in a  place in my heart that is emblazoned with your name on it, a place that grows larger every day, with every smile, and every hug.

You are growing fast, and becoming your own person. You’ve always had a fiercely independent mind, never easily influenced, never easily manipulated. Even as a baby you would look up at my goo-goo ga-ga silliness as I tried to make you laugh, with a wiser-than-your-years look in your eyes that spoke the words your mouth couldn’t:
“Woman, stop acting like a fool. That is NOT funny and we both know it. Let’s talk politics – do I REALLY need to wait 2 more hours to get some more of that milk-lovin’?”

You amaze me every day now with your growing vocabulary, your ability to reason and argue with us, sometimes backing us into a logical corner. When you do that, I usually allow you to get your way, since really, who am I to refuse you the victory of a won argument?
Talking to you is more fun than anything else these days, since I get a glimpse of the person you are going to become, and that person is already pretty cool.

My darling baby, my “batteekha”, my silly willy, my sweetheart, my Noah. Mama loves you more than you will ever know, and I can only hope you can feel it.

Perfect timing. You just woke up and ran into my arms for your birthday morning hug, claiming “I’m FOUR NOW MAMA!!!”

Today is going to be fun, I can feel it. :)

Happy birthday, my love.

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2 Responses to Four.

  1. kinziblogs says:

    Sniff. So sweet. I remember when my 6’2″ son was four. Habby Bearsday!

  2. monz says:

    awww… I love you and I love your Nawnaw! he is the coolest kid I know ;) and you are a great mother, hala! enshallah 3o2bal il 1000

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